Forget the sheet. Bring on the lions!
Dinosaur is about an iguanodon
who is orphaned and raised by monkeys far too
advanced for their geological age.
Monkeys!
Why put vaguely irritating, overly-evolved mammals
in a movie that people are only going to see
for the dino's? A stupid decision in a movie:
now
there's a novelty.
This is primarily a kids film, but I went along
for the digital sfx, and I have always loved
dino's. At a kids level this is great stuff.
Yet, perhaps only Hollywood (the film was made
by Disney) could make a dinosaur seem boring.
I refer to the hero of
Dinosaur.
This iguanodon and his girlfriend are so dull
it is amazing. The leading couple are akin to
having a particularly pious, virtuous and, well,
nice priest gatecrash a student party.
Only much more tedious than that because you
can get a lot of entertainment of out of listening
to the irrational ramblings of priests at parties
when you're drunk. Well, maybe not.
The hero of Dinosaur caused me to
switch off, he was like watching a dead prehistoric
sheep, which is, indeed, what he was. That
orange comedy-monkey was bloody awful too.
And the villainous carnosaurs were nowhere near
as effective as the Jurassic Park slashers.
Jurassic Park was novel however, so the shock
will never be quite the same. I wanted to see
a fantastic predator and these carnosaurs didn't
quite do it for me. This could be because of
the PG rating of the film, so this isn't a huge
criticism. They would be horrific enough, I
imagine, to the kids, whom this film is presumably
chiefly aimed at.
On the bright side
Dinosaur just
about sated my digital special effects craving.
One interesting thing about those stupid monkeys,
at least to a geek like me, was their digital
fur,
very nice.
Dinosaur
has some fantastic set pieces, absolutely fantastic.
They all occur during the first third or so
of the move. This has the effect of leaving
one feel slightly wound down towards the end
of the flick. This film seemed to run out of
energy and peter out. I saw the climactic scene
and said to myself, hmmmmmm This must be the
climactic scene. Ho hum. It was
that
crass. There wasn't much happiness or logic
to the story. Instead of building up to a tense
climax, this movie more is like a rollercoaster,
but not in the usual sense of the analogy: the
allusion to repeated ups and downs. Rather,
Dinosaur takes to the apex right
away, casts you down
furiously, and then
for the rest of the ride it gradually grinds
you to a halt, never again subjecting you to
the exhilaration of that initial build up and
fall.
Dinosaur lacked that crucial spark.
As a lifelong dino fan, this disappointment
was particularly irksome; it's a blaspheme to
my prehistoric gods.
Dinosaurs aren't what
they used to be.
The
iguanodons get eaten by the heinous gargantuan
carnivores. That is what the kids want. That
is what I want. Can't Hollywood EVER give us
what we want? GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
Add your comment to this page
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| From: |
Jim | Subject: | 2002-12-08 18:38:49 |
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| From: |
Mark Radburn | Subject: | 2004-10-30 02:59:52 |
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| From: |
Eadon | Subject: | 2004-10-30 10:19:50 |
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| From: |
Steven Brady | Subject: | 2004-10-31 02:31:05 |
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| From: |
Luke Blackadder | Subject: | 2004-11-04 07:54:26 |
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| From: |
George Jobson | Subject: | 2006-05-11 11:42:32 |
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