A lass that can suck the lifeforce from your
body with her lips? Kinky!
X-men is based on a comic that
I am unfamiliar with. But I am a sucker for
digital effects-powered blockbusters, and, after
a thankless day at the office, I sloped off
to the local fleepit to wind down and enjoy
the show.
It is the near future and "Mutants",
effectively Genetically Modified human beings
with fantastical abilities, are threatening
to overwhelm society. The politically correct
brigade argue that the Mutants are equal where
as right-wingers highlight the threat to mankind.
There are all sorts of weird messages coming
across here, it was nice to see some playful
but thoughtful politics going on in a kid's
blockbuster. But forget all that, it is just
a catalyst for the crazed action which follows.
As it turns out there are good Mutants: the
X-men led by trekkie luvvie Patrick
Steward; and bad: a weird gang managed by the
sinister Ian McKellan. These vets of both serious
and Hollywood acting were great fun. It is nice
to see the oldies getting key parts in a blockbuster.
They added a welcome tier of combat to the proceedings:
the oldies fought with their minds and left
the physical combat to their wacky young acolytes.
X-men is a groovy movie aimed
at youngish males, with awesome effects set
pieces and, surprisingly, a plot too. If I were
in my early teens I would have almost died of
pleasure watching this. I felt young again after
watching it. One of the curses of being over
30 is that the magic of films like this no longer
quite hits the spot. I found myself analysing
instead of accepting the romp at face value.
I asked myself questions like:
how can a
genetic mutation allow you to walk on water?
Believe that a man can walk on water and you'll
believe anything.
I felt sorry for Storm, who's pathetic special
ability was to make it rain. Much cooler was
Wolverine, who sported mutant sideburns and
hands that sprouted Freddie Kreuger-style blades
when he was miffed. And the lass who sucked
the life-force from you when she kissed you:
that wasn't a
mutation, that was
femininity.
And you should see what Toad can do with his
tongue. His particular breed of Mutant must
be popular with the ladies.
The
bare, blue, baddie babe triggers a fashion trend
in the real world.
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